5 Ways to Cope When Mother’s Day is Difficult
Mother’s Day is often portrayed to be a picture-perfect day of celebration, but for many it can bring up a lot of emotion. Whether you have a challenging or estranged relationship with your mother, are grieving a loss, processing past trauma, or navigating infertility challenges, the day might be more painful than you would hope. If you find this holiday triggering, you are not alone. Here are some tips on how to cope with it.
Notice and name the emotion
Pay attention and notice what feelings are coming up for you both leading up to the holiday and on the day itself. Awareness is very powerful in working through difficult things. When you are able to recognize and identify the emotions you are experiencing, the more you will be able to cope with them.
Take a social media break
Social media often leads to getting stuck in a cycle of comparison and this can be very activating on days where there are going to be a lot of scrolling through pictures of the holiday that might be difficult to see. Feel free to honor yourself and your emotions by stepping away from social media so that you can break that comparison cycle and replace it with other activities, such as getting outside, taking deep breaths, or movement, all of which can be helpful in emotion regulation.
Reach out for support
If there are people in your life you feel safe with, you might try to connect with them and ask for support in any way you might find helpful. Whether that be someone to laugh with, sit with, or just listen, your support network can be helpful during these times. If you are seeing a therapist, it is a good idea to discuss the holiday and the emotions it brings up for you with them and get support that way. Connection and support can make carrying the difficulty of the day just a little bit easier.
Plan ahead
Think in advance about how you want to spend the day. This might mean creating limits with events you choose to attend or not attend. This can also mean setting boundaries with family and friends so that you can spend the day as you need to. If you plan ahead, you are creating space to be able to navigate the day in a way that feels best for you.
Self-compassion
Most importantly, honor yourself and how you are feeling by giving yourself grace and self-compassion. There is no “right”, “wrong”, “good” or “bad” way to feel and whatever comes up for you is valid. You deserve to feel acknowledged and supported, and giving that to yourself is so important. Identify what you need and create space for healing.
Mother’s Day can be difficult for so many people and hopefully these tips can provide a sense of comfort in how to cope with it. You are not alone.
With love,
Hannah
Note: Everything posted here is for educational purposes only and is not a replacement for individualized mental health treatment. If you would like to start therapy with me, click HERE.
